Calling Your Bluff

Here's a scary thought. Boris Johnson became Mayor of London following his 'successful' appearance on Have I Got News For You. Now Wendy Alexander is claiming that her political strategy is really a game based on Call My Bluff.

Picture this... Brian Taylor in the role of Robert Robinson as quizmaster general. On the panel tonight we have Wendy Alexander doing an impersonation of Sandi Toksvig, Gordon Brown looking scarily like Robert Morley, and finally a loo brush by the name of Frank Muir.

BRIAN: And the first word tonight is.... REFERENDUM. Now then panel, what does this mean..... Wendy Alexander:

WENDY: Well, a REFERENDUM is a democratic tool utilised in specific circumstances to decide a nation's constitutional future or direction. For example, the Labour Government in 1997 held a REFERENDUM to gage the people of Scotland's willingness to re-establish a Scottish Parliament. The Scottish Labour Party is all for REFERENDUMS and would use one in deciding whether Scotland should become independent or not.

BRIAN: Thank you for that Ms Alexander. Let's move on to the Clunking Fist himself, Gordon Brown.

GORDON: REFERENDUM is a disease most commonly found in the British Isles which particularly effects politicians who can't lead their country properly. Once infected, the poor victim screams in pain for more and more REFERENDUMS to relieve their suffering.

BRIAN: Interesting definition there. As our last panel member is an inanimate object used for getting the dirt from under difficult lips, we'll pass on that definition. So there we have it: REFERENDUM - a plebiscite to democratically test a nation's desire for constitutional change or an illness which effects weak politicians. Who is bluffing and who is telling the truth. Please reveal the answer.

Wendy and Gordon open up their manilla folders to reveal the words TRUE and BLUFF.

BRIAN: Well there you have it. A REFERENDUM is a democratic device used throughout the world to empower electorates to make specific decisions about matters of strategic and often sovereign importance. Who would have thought it... Wendy you may think you are the winner tonight but it's actually the loo brush. Eventhough you may make more U-turns, it gets round U-shaped structures better.

A week is a long time in politics

Tartan Hero is back. After a good couple of months to regenerate the batteries, I've been itching (literally and metaphorically, but that's eczema for you!), to comment on dozens of stories over what has been an eventful period.

However, the past week has been too good a period in modern Scottish political history to miss. I don't think I have ever heard of such an inept, catastrophic issue for a political party as has been the handling of a Scottish independence referendum by the Labour Party. For starters, Wendy on Newsnight Scotland last Monday:


As to whether Gordon backed Wendy initially and then baulked at publicly supporting her at PMQ, we will probably never know. Did Wendy get pushed into a corner under intense journalistic interrogation that she thought this tactic would get her off the hook? Well, Glenn Campbell is hardly a political rotweiller so that dispels that notion. Plus, for all Wendy's faults, too many to mention today, of course, she is experienced enough in how to hold a message.

So, one is left in the clear mind that this was a proactive campaign idea to steal the SNP's thunder as it marked one year in office. After all, how do you go from this (6 weeks ago) to this week's announcement:


Well, for the Nationalists, and to a man and woman it been an almost incredible week, the prospect of your principal opposition party delivering your number one policy intention was too much to believe. And by yesterday's Scottish Labour Executive meeting, so reality has kicked in with the infamous concordat between Brown and Alexander.

But whatever the recriminations within the Labour Party, and there will be many, and whatever the recriminations between the Labour Party and its Unionist allies, and there will be many, what the Scottish public will want to know is: will Labour let the people have a referendum on Scottish independence?

For even if Downing Street and Holyrood can't agree, surely the unequivocal support for the tactic of supporting an Independence referendum (Foulkes: timing, dear boy, it was all about timing), Labour MSPs must follow their declared support for the Bill when it does come to the Chamber.

All last week we heard Labour MSP after MSP being wheeled out to support Wendy's cunning plan: Iain Gray in a masterful interview on Newsnight Scotland (which the BBC mischeviously used the sound interview to be replayed on Good Morning Scotland the next day), Duncan McNeill (we're 100% behind you, darling), and even the forlorn Malcolm Chisholm, the last vestige of Labour respectability in Holyrood, had to do his bit on Politics Now. Ah well, no Labour MSP hath a greater honour than to lay down his political life for his leader. Still, the divergence in political strategy within one party has never been more noticeable.

Henry McLeish, doyen of ex-FM commentators, summed it up beautifully in this fairly savage attack on Wendy:

"This is the worst of all possible worlds. We have marginalised the Calman Commission (the body studying more powers for the Scottish Parliament), confused the Scottish public, taken the Liberals and the Tories out of the equation and seemed more enthusiastic than the SNP to have a referendum."

Gordo at his best... leaving his people high 'n' dry ....

Have a break....

I'm taking a break from blogging for a month or two. Got a lot on my plate at the moment and struggling to do this justice. Hopefully back in the early summer. GT

English Broadcasting Corporation again...

There was an air of predictability in the response or rather defence of BBC Scotland to the First Minister's criticism that Scotland's World Cup qualifying games should be broadcast on terrestial television.

Ewan Angus, head of sport at BBC Scotland, said: "BBC Scotland attempts to secure live rights for Scotland games where possible.... However it is an open market which is becoming ever more competitive and we have to be mindful, as a public service broadcaster with a finite amount of money to spend on sports rights, of using the licence fee to serve all of our audiences."

So, why is that all of England's matches will be broadcast on the BBC? Was there no change left to pay for other countries within the UK to see their national teams on the telly?

Speaker Martin: should he stay or should he go?

It's pretty obvious that many 'honourable' members of the House of Commons have had it 'in for 'im' since he 'managed' to be elected Speaker. Whether he is a good Speaker or not, frankly my dear I couldn't give a damn. It's an irony that so many members of the Commons think that the Speaker is ...how shall I put it, too common.

However, he has certainly been getting himself into a lot of bother. Air Miles abuse one week. Losing a key aide because the aide in question still had an ounce of honour and ethics in how he chose to do his work. In the meantime, I support Sir Alastair Graham's call for Speaker Martin to stand down from chairing the review of MP expenses. He clearly doesn't have the impartiality or probity over his own expenses to then go about determining what will be best for the future.

And in case you're wondering what it all means in pounds, shillings and pence, here's a breakdown:

The Speaker’s bill
£137,000 Salary; he also gets a grace-and-favour apartment
£17,346 Expenses he claimed for a second home last year £7,595 - How can you have a second home when you have a free flat in Westminster?
Expenses he claimed last year for running costs for using his Scottish home as
an office, a practice from which MPs are discouraged
£50,000 Amount of public money he spent on air travel for his wife, Mary. She also spent more than £4,000 on taxis
£21,500 Amount of public money spent on legal challenges by Mr Martin’s office to newspapers, including The Times
£3,000 Value of Air Miles used by Mr Martin to fund flights between Scotland and London for his family. Guidelines stipulate that Air Miles should be used to reduce the cost of travel paid for by the taxpayer
£15,201 He also claimed £3,138 in car allowances, £10,587 in flights and £1,476 on stationery and postage

Go Ape at the voters

Consultation.... Glasgow with style! Here Cllr Ruth Simpson, Executive Member for Land & Environmental Services, is telling an audience of 800-1000 local people what consultation really means.

More SNP Council By-election success

The SNP held on to the Highland Ward by-election on Perth & Kinross Council with a swing of 3% from the Tories to the SNP. Well done to Kate Howie. This comes on the back of last week's gain for the SNP in the Elgin City South by-election where John Sharp won with a 6% swing from Labour who fell from second to third place.

So when it comes to real votes and not opinion polls, the real scores on the doors for the parties is like this: